U.S. On Verge Of Full-Scale Government Hoedown | The Onion

In light of the ongoing idiocy of the Republican Party and because laughing beats crying or breaking things in a rage, the Onion:

Already donning the bib overalls, Stetson hats, and festive gingham
skirts that they will wear throughout what is expected to be a long
and strenuous hoedown, legislators on both sides of the aisle told
reporters that there is little chance of Democrats and Republicans
negotiating a last-minute deal that would forestall a countrified barn
burner the likes of which the federal government has never before
seen.